Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
