saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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