You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I understand Curling. That high.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER