Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music