oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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