Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
false alarm. still invincible.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
