We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
