bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
