i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
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