Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
