we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
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