I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize