she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
where does the pee come out of this thing
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
You've changed since you got that strap on
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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