I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
