Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
