What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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