please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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