I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
