just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
As shirtless as possible
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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