I am spending my child support on dildos
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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