He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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