why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
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