so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
