My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Randomize
