There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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