The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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