His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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