I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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