you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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