ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
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