I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
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It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
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