Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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