I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize