he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
He told me they were just razor bumps!
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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