My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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