ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
The air was thick with penises
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Randomize