please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize