A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
