Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
