Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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