in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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