You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
