I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
foreskin is a definite game changer
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize