so explain again why im purple
no
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
