i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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