I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
