I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
