It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
splinters make it hard to masturbate
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
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