get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
