how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize