hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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