what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
sex in a hospital.. check
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
